I think dating is frustrating. I think getting to know someone, actually starting to care about them then months later finding out they just aren't into you is a vicious cycle and an emotional roller coaster. I wish defining someone as your significant other could be as easy as defining someone as your best friend, it just works.
My gal pals and I always joke around about how easy it was for us to fall in love with each other. Friendships are so easy to come by, they usually start with cocktails, and after discussing similarities and differences, you decide that the person you just met might actually be your new best friend. However, in my experience, when trying to find someone who I could actually see myself with, there is far more confusion than just going with the flow.
You can blow up your friends phone at all hours of the day and night and they know you are crazy, but love you that much more for it. If you even tried to double text the person you're interested in or even cross that line of actually calling them on the phone, you are a stage 5 clinger and they don't want to talk to you anymore.
With my friends, we can go out to dinner or drinks and have a constant flow of conversation. No awkward moments, and you don't even think twice about ordering that burger that you have been craving for weeks. The last time I went out to drinks with a datable prospect, I constantly questioned if what I was saying was the right thing. Also, when I get nervous I talk at 100 mph and my face gets red, and I sweat...and because of that, it's awkward.
People always say that the person you'll be with should be 'your best friend,' and I never understood it until I looked at the situation from this stand point.
With our friends we don't try to be something we aren't. We are who we are, and they love us anyway. With people we are trying to impress, we almost have to go through a series of job interviews and awkward moments just to finally get to a point where they kind of like us enough to stick around. Then you tell yourself you won't tell them about your annoying habit of asking too many questions and your obsession with New Girl until they are hooked, then you'll release the demons.
Wouldn't it be easier if we could just be in relationships like we are in friendships. I know my friends would do absolutely anything for me, and I know that they didn't think about leaving me because of that one time I got too drunk at the bar, or that other time that they had to hold my hair back while I hung shamelessly over a toilet. My friends embrace my flaws, and I embrace theirs, if we were perfect, what would we have to laugh at on any given day of the week? Friends are always there, through the good, the bad, the ugly and the inconvenient. Woudn't it be reassuring that your significant other would be too?
I'm sure a lot of you are going to think "Bonnie, this exists. Love exists. You'll find it one day. Be patient." I've heard it people, and I don't think I'll be single forever. However, I do think that there has to be an easier way to find someone that I am completely compatible with and somehow avoid all of the awkward moments, games, and insecurity/ trust issues that come with it.
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